Dealing with the Feeling of Being Too Much
Most people deep down feel like they are not good enough, and they hustle and work hard to prove otherwise.
Then there’s another type, and also another phase for some of us, when we refuse to show up the way we are. We are desperately scared to appear over the top, to be “too much.”
Very likely when we were children, our parents had told us to keep it quiet. We assumed our natural way of being is distractive or even damaging. And, boy, didn’t we hear the proof of that!? You’re giving me a headache! Stop this noise or I will explode! Why do you have to be so loud! You are killing me with this noise! Some of us, who were more extraverted, heard those words again and again.
What happened? Why are you so sad?
Well, I’m not sad, I’m just quiet.
Don’t be so serious! Cheer up! You need to come out of your shell!
We saw our lighthearted life-long companions, like family and friends, feeling threatened by us being so quiet. We knew, they were worried because they were missing some signs, special understanding, that we could grasp through our natural tendency to observe and process. But then, through all the mental and physical pollution I mentioned, we believed, we know, see, and feel too much.
There’s no need for that kind of sensitivity and clarity. So we cheered up, typically through acting and masquerading our truth, the perception of the world we could enjoy through a careful quiet observation and deep analysis.
As a closet introvert myself, I remember exactly how it felt being around other people who couldn’t stand stillness and depth of my mind. I felt tired. Wearing masks of superficiality and foolishness is tiring. I thought I had to, because I wanted to fit in. I wish I didn’t give up on my ability to belong, instead.
Right now, the only option you have, is to be brave. I am sorry to bring it to you like this. But it is time for you to stand up straight and be as big and powerful, and as deep and wise as you are. No more pretense, no more trying to fit the clothes someone else has chosen for you because they couldn’t take your style.
Own your soulful age. Own your capacity to create change in this world.
Later in the next blog post we will talk about the change you are meant to create. You will know why you have so much energy and so many ambitions. And don’t even try to camouflage yourself among the other lost souls. With you shining bright, you give permission to others to come out of their woods and be as big and as deep as they were born to be. Someone has to start. Let it be you.
To inspire and motivate you, I want to ask you two simple questions.
Take two minutes to contemplate in detail:
What would happen if you do (be yourself)?
What would happen if you don’t?
If you can’t wait and what to exercise your belonging immediately, I can recommend you my book “I Belong, The Journey from Lost to Found”, which you can get on Amazon as soon as you click this link.
Lira Kay an author, life coach and a founder of She's Got Passion and the School of Inspired Life a training center for purpose-driven professionals to find information and inspiration to stay on their mission to create a meaningful change in the world. Every Wednesday Lira answers one question she 's been asked by a member of her audience around the globe. If you have a question, please, go to CONTACT and send Lira your question. She will create a post to answer it or will send you a personal answer in the email. Know, that your question will help many others to find clarity and motivation. We are all connected and your input is important. Thank you.
